The Road


The RoadThe Road by Cormac McCarthy
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Nothing like ringing in the new year with a post-apocalyptic book. Cheery! When this book came out and there was so much buzz about it I had little desire to read it. But it came across my nightstand at just the right moment so I gave it a shot. I'm so glad I did. It was incredibly rich and worthwhile. Enjoyable seems like the wrong type of word considering the subject matter, but the language was simply incredible and the format of the book is very accessible.

What I learned:
There's an incredible amount in these pages about life. I love books that take humanity to its very essential frame and examine it. How would I behave in such dire circumstances? What does that tell me about how I navigate my days from my exceedingly cushy vantage point?
There's also a great deal about parenthood in the novel. What would you do for your children? What are the limits of mercy? How many of my "ethical" choices are relative to my circumstances?

What I loved:
The language. Some of McCarthy's short passages were breathtaking.
The questions. I like books that make me think.
The boy's voice. He was truly the embodiment of the best of human nature. It was so important to have a child in the story. Even though the book is heavy and dark, I think the author is showing an optimistic point of view by including him.

A favorite passage:
No lists of things to be done. The day is providential to itself. The hour. There is no later. This is later. All things of grace and beauty such that one holds them to one's heart have a common provenance in pain. Their birth is grief and ashes. So, he whispered to the sleeping boy. I have you.

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1Q841Q84 by Haruki Murakami
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

It is so hard for me to describe what I love about Murakami's books. I definitely do not recommend them unless you appreciate the bizarre. This one was slightly less surreal and fantastical than some of his other titles, but still had lots of his characteristic craziness. It is long enough that I had to pace myself rather than rush through it, but I really enjoyed it all the way through. The characters were intriguing and the plot was great. Wild and strange, but great.

I am a total sucker for a romance plot line with separated lovers struggling to be reunited. There is so much to be drawn from examining the characters. One of my favorite passages is near the end. I'd consider it something of a spoiler alert except I doubt anyone I know would want to read this book.

It was such a long time, Aomame thought.

It was such a long time, Tengo thought too. At the same time, though, he noticed how the twenty years that had passed now held no substance. it had passed by in an instant, and took but an instant to be filed in.

...Tengo once again keenly felt the mind's ability to relativize time. Twenty years was a long time. But Tengo knew that if he were to meet Aomame in another twenty years, he would feel the same way he did now. Even if they were both over fifty, he would still feel the same mix of excitement and confusion in her presence. His heart would be filed with the same joy and certainty.

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Witness the carnage that once was two gingerbread houses. Someone call FEMA. 

Moment of the day

Georgeous day calls for being outside. The girls are rocking the park while I catch up on some neglected magazines. I absolutely adore the nothingness of this week between Christmas and New Year's. Love not working, love putting the house back in order, love having no agenda. 

Moment of the day


Evening walk through the neighborhood to see the last of the Christmas lights

SoCo and BBQ


We took a little sister time today and went window shopping on South Congress. I don't get enough of my sisters so it's been fabulous to hang out and stay up too late and generally enjoy their company. Ben, don't you feel left out? We would have found a hat for you too.

My dad and sisters head home tomorrow so we took our last night together and headed out to the Salt Lick for some delish BBQ. It's been a lovely visit all around, so glad they could come.

Future Longhorn


Xandy asked to visit her current obsession and future home, the University of Texas. We had fun frolicking around on the grass near the turtle pond. Another beautiful and sunny day even though the forecast said rain. Yay for sunshine!

Merry Christmas

Happy Gingerbread Day


Back row houses: Tessa, Sylvie, Haley; Front row houses: Xandy, Anna

Total win for gingerbread day this year. I woke up this morning to a little rain which made me nervous after last year's cluster of humidity related fiascoes. But everything worked like a charm. I am apparently gaining gingerbread related wisdom as the years march on. I made five houses again this year after swearing I wouldn't ever again last year. But I had many helping hands and it went super smooth. Yay us! Anna had some trouble with a collapsing roof, but she is tenacious and totally made it work. Tessa and Sylvie complained about my OCD need to buy only red and green candy but I still think they look great (and will do the same next year). We also added jolly rancher stained glass windows this year which was a nice touch. Next year we'll have to add a sun room or something to up the ante.

I use four batches of this recipe for icing and it was absolute perfection for construction and this is my favorite all time gingerbread recipe although I halve the ginger and cloves (quadrupled as well made just barely five houses). It stays good for weeks even sitting out. Our gingerbread is for eating, not just looking in this house.

Town Lake



Crazy gorgeous day yesterday afternoon and we capitalized on it in a big way by heading down to Town Lake to rent canoes. So much fun. Absolutely no other way to say it.

Xandy was determined to catch one of the hundreds of turtles that sun themselves along the water's edge. And at the last minute she made it happen. I think she was as surprised as we were.

We stopped off by Sugar Mama's on the way home. I know I'll get push back on this one, but they truly get my vote for best cupcake. Better than Hey Cupcake. Jack's Lemon is among my favorite desserts ever. Mmmm.


Love my sisters with a fiery passion from deep inside my pancreas!



This Christmas I am very clear about what I want and what I NEED...



More than one moment to my day. Some last minute shopping, a class party, and hanging out at home. Good day.

Sweet musical girl


Sylvie is such an enigma. They say girls are made of sugar and spice but I like to think of Sylvie as sweet and sour. Which is one of her favorite dinners so I guess that works. She does have a lot of anxiety and other emotional volcanoes, but underneath it all is the most incredibly sweet and caring girl. She has given me more hugs in her short life than I could ever deserve.

It is true that siblings seem to differentiate and I think Sylvie has always lived under the shadow of Tessa being the "artisitic" one, but she's come into her own lately and I find her drawing a good portion of her free time. She usually won't share her pictures with any of us, but she did show me this Christmas card which I fell in love with. She's always humming under her breath or tapping with her fingers whatever song she's assigned in piano that week - music runs in this girl's soul. I am a little envious of her gift and I'm wondering how long it is until she's a better pianist than I am. Not that that's a very high bar. Ah, I love this girl!

Funny, funny, sweet girl

I need to tell y'all how adorable my Tessa is. First of all, she genuinely uses the word "y'all" and it doesn't even annoy me - I actually find it endearing. She is just funny and kind and easy going and just pretty amazing all around. There are of course some negative adjectives hidden in there too but nothing much out of the ordinary kid stuff.

Exhibit A: Her class is having a sock exchange party tomorrow and she couldn't be just content with wrapping up a pair of socks, she had to write a instruction manual to go with them. Yes, an instruction manual for socks. Transcribed below:
As rightful owners of Fred (right) and Joe (left) I give you this manual. You will need it. To take care of Fred and Joe you must serve them one teaspoon of pure cocoa powder each day. You must put them to bed at 8:32 pm each day or they will get cranky. I have enclosed there favorite toy in this card. (A purple rubber band taped inside the card) During winter season you must put them o your feet. Do that or they will get cold. Joe is lactose entolorent and Fred is allergict to peanuts. Take care and Merry Christmas.
Exhibit B: Next week there is a slipper day at school and I have been crocheting slippers for both girls to wear per their request. Dave didn't key in to this fact and offered Tessa his moose slippers to wear which she eagerly accepted. My feelings were minorly hurt and Tessa I guess got the message. She is usually one to avoid conflict or even the resolution of conflict, but I found this note on my pillow when I got home last night. I laughed out loud. Sweet girl.
Iz beez havin' bad grammar.
I iz gonna not wear dads moose slippers. Iz gona wear yours! Sowwy!

Moment of the day

Rainy, rainy, rainy day. It's lovely. 

Year in Review 2011


I'm having a hard time deciding what flavor 2011 has been for my annual Year in Review post. Some years seem to be landmark or pivotal but this year just flew by, not sticking in my head as particularly one thing or the other. I am also in extreme forward thinking mode as the next year has a lot of stuff coming so I'm probably not giving cute little 2011 its due.

We seem to all be generally intact and doing well. Dave is enjoying his job a lot and that is a great thing. He is logging lots of miles running each week as always. He is more stalwart as a runner than I could ever completely understand. This year he ran marathons in Tulsa and Salt Lake, numbers four and five in his illustrious career. I have noticed things with professional sports are not superb this year, but you'd have to ask him about that since I seem to have stopped even pretending to pay attention.

The girls are doing really great in school and are generally amazing each and every day. They celebrated birthdays ten and seven this year. I am fully aware that these are the "good" years between diapers and hormones; trust that I live every day reveling in that fact. Tessa has loved choir this year in both 4th and 5th grade. Sylvie is still in love with the piano, she really has a gift for it. (Tessa is still playing but love is not the best adjective there even though she is a really good pianist.) Sylvie tried out tap dance classes but in the end it wasn't completely her thing. The girls have had a lot of highlights but I would imagine our snow day and blue hole would be among their favorites. And of course our big trip to Utah/Wyoming to visit family and friends.

My banner event of the year was without a doubt hiking the Grand Canyon. I've said more than enough on that topic but it was absolutely magical. I also had a great girls' weekend in San Antonio for my birthday. I guess it was a good year. If you're just tuning in, the work thing is a little crazy for me right now as I've just found out my job will be ending in June. I am optimistic that things will work out for the best. And of course 2011 was the year I unveiled more of the crazy and embarked on my epic Daytum project. I'll write more about that later as the year wraps up.

We're slowly working on the house still. This has become a definite slow burn with me rather than a consuming frenzy like it was in our Phoenix house. We had a carpenter redo our fireplace this year and it is lovely, lovely, lovely. But the family room is still not painted and that has prevented me from taking good pictures to show off. Maybe next year. The yard is a blah holding pattern as we've had an absolutely horrid drought this year and the plants are far from happy. It's been bad enough to slightly dent my rosy estimation of my beloved Austin.

I hope this busy but wonderful Christmas seasons finds all our friends and family well. I realized just this last week that Christmas cards didn't quite make my list of things to do this year. Perhaps every other year will have to be good enough. But I hope you all know that here in Austin there are fond wishes and love for each and every one of you. Merry Christmas!

Moment of the day


Another foggy day to run in. I've been enjoying much the wintery weather. Just cold enough for yummy scarves but not cold enough to qualify as winter any place other than the sun belt. 

Christmas past

I'm feeling nostalgic so I went through some old Christmas photos and found these gems. This was 2004 and it's hard to believe my girls have grown so much.

Tessa has always been an artist. Here she is as an adorable 3 year old, drawing a picture of the tiny nativity set you can see on the table next to her. She did this more than once and it kept her occupied for many hours that Christmas.

Sylvie's first Christmas. She was (and is) such a cutie.

Yet another Adele song

I would call her songs a guilty pleasure but I have no guilt...

Moment of the day


I haven't been running at town lake in forever. But it felt like the exact right thing to do this morning. I don't think you can see it in the picture, but someone has painted a mural on the side of the bridge that says "focus on one point and breathe ". Good advice. There was another one further down that said "let's all pretend we're robots". Love it. 

5th Grade Musical


Tessa was in the 5th Grade choir musical performance today. Twas the Crazy Night Before Christmas I believe was the title. And crazy it was. Tessa was a "detective dancer" during the scene where they tried to figure out who the impostors were among the three claiming to be Santa. She had an absolute blast during the performance as well as the practices and hard work leading up to today. It makes me happy to see her really loving something. You can spot her in the pictures by her giant curtain of hair.


I haven't been sleeping well and that is a sure sign that things are askew in my head. I almost never have trouble sleeping but here it is. How nice. I understandably have a lot brewing in my noggin with new job/career prospects and game plans darting about. I'm not really *worried* about what to do next, I know I have a lot of time yet (since my job doesn't end until June). But I do like things to be settled so indecision is always an extremely uncomfortable place for me. No matter what the choice is, I do a pretty exhaustive overview of the options and then decide fairly immediately. For better or for worse. For shopping and the like this process works pretty well, but for major life decisions I realize I need to pace myself a bit. What? Patience?

At this moment in time I am considering strongly becoming certified to teach middle or high school math rather than continue in Institutional Research. It just feels like time for a change. Teaching math was my original plan when I earned my bachelor's degree forever ago, I just got distracted for 12 years or so by an awesome job. I feel passionately about education, especially math education. So doing something that has true impact feels worth the tremendous effort it will require to get myself certified for the classroom, the longer working day, as well as an hourly pay cut. Way to sell it, Amber!

The big problem is it's hard to jump into a significant cost (meaning all resources: financial, time, burden on my family, as well as my sanity) when the benefit is something of an unknown. I of course don't really know how well suited I am for teaching or if the realities of managing today's classroom will be a bigger negative than the theoretical joy from passing on a love of geometry and calculus. I don't think there are always "right" choices in big life decisions. You just pick your path and utilize Grace to live with karma that arises. I am being prayerful and thoughtful about my decision. I know that whatever path I choose, my Heavenly Father will give me the resources to deal with the good and bad ahead.

Moment of the day


It's cold outside. A good afternoon for a cup of herbal tea and a magazine. 

Moment of the day


Christmas tree. Festive. 

Which is truer?

om mani padme hum


I have made a concerted effort over the past few years to be a more open person. Social connection doesn't always come easy or naturally for me, but I have made a real effort to share more of myself with those around me. Blogging has been a big part of this, but I have also sought out more social outlets and strong friendships. I am one who feels love through quality time in the form of meaningful conversation (thank you Five Love Languages) so this effort has been very beneficial for me; positive growth indeed. But along with the good, there is a negative side affect that I have been trying to combat. I have learned to share more of myself and my thoughts on those things that affect me directly, but I have also found myself with too many quickly formed negative and judgmental opinions on others. I think it is a natural human condition to discuss those around us. It is part of how we learn about ourselves to compare and contextualize. I don't think this is necessarily wrong nor do I think talking about others always falls under the category of "gossip". But I don't want trite or judgmental comments to be part of my language or thought processes.

To remind my self to stay elevated in my speech and thought, I bought a ring last year with the Tibetan prayer of compassion inscribed on it. Om mani padme hum is means many things, but at it's root is the message of compassion, which I think translates best to the LDS tradition as charity, or generally as love. The ring has an outer ring that spins around the inner ring; the movement is said to invoke the prayer as well as if it were spoken aloud in the tradition of the prayer wheels in Tibet. It has served as a touchstone for me to keep compassion, charity, love for my fellow man at the forefront of my choices.